Last night I completed my initiation. I am truly a Druid Candidate. I actually feel a little different... it's kind of weird.
The initiation went very well. It was calming... the candles, the incense burning, the imagery, the words, responses, and meanings. I had to chose a Deity to talk to. I guess I could have said God(ess) or whatever, but I wanted to talk to "someone". I chose Brighid. I have always felt a pull to her, so she is who I chose.
When it was done, I kept the SOP open and finally completed my blessing on my tarot, then I proceeded to pull a 20 card New Year spread. I am having to tailor some of it for myself (They have the New Year start in Jan, but I made it known that I was starting Nov 1). I wrote the spread down with brief meanings. I am going to spend a few days pouring over the whole spread and meanings and figure out what it REALLY means to me.
Yesterday I also received my OBOD packet in the mail. Not sure if I want to complete their process along side this one. They are more written and study oriented, with specific items discussed and covered. But I am keeping an open mind and reviewing the material. I will not make a rush decision, and I will not close the door completely if that is my decision.
I am enjoying the AODA. It is my own personal journey. I am told "here is the path and there is the end, walk it at your pace and in whatever fashion you want so long as you arrive at the end some day."
On an aside, I want to mention that it is very intimidating not having a pagan background. I see all these people coming into the druid path and they have a string of paganism behind them in some form or another. I am learning from scratch. It is something I have wanted to do for years, but never had the nerve to say out loud to people "this is what I believe". And now that I have, I am reminded how much of a novice in all of this I am. There is no wicca, or fairie, or whatever in my background.
I try to remind myself that they all started somewhere too and that they don't look down on me for it... that this is a self-imposed feeling that I have. And that it is OK to ask the group questions that I am afraid they will find silly. It is just hard sometimes.
I wish my email for a mentor would have been answered... but Silverhawk is happily answering all my questions in group so that is good for now.
Remember A - you can do this.
I'm sure you'll find your way.
ReplyDeleteI think I might join OBOD after I complete the Second Degree of AODA, if I am looking for something to do next at that point. But one at a time keeps me busy enough.
We all come from different backgrounds. We all have different pasts, and we all are choosing a different path to the future as well. So not all of us come from a pagan background, and not all of us consider ourselves pagan now.
Everyone is "learning from scratch" when they first start learning something. Whatever a person has learned already, there was a time when they started learning it, when they didn't know it.
When I joined, I sent some questions by email that never got answered, but questions to the mailing lists do seem to get answered more than individual emails do. And I managed to find my way. I have been a Candidate for about 5 months now.